My friend Soupsie and I were talking this week about the funk we both seem to have fallen in to – here is a recent text conversation:
Me: Do you ever have days when you feel like you’re failing at everything? I hate that.
Soupsie: Yes. I call it October.
Me: I get that. I really feel like I suck at life these days.
Soupsie: Maybe it’s our age? Or we have unrealistic expectations of our own abilities?
Me: Can’t be us, we are friggin’ awesome.
Soupsie: Ya…but think of the others….
Soupsie: Lol…I just mean that the others know we are friggin’ awesome…it must be tough for them.
Me: Ah. So true.
As scintillating as this is, the conversation had actually started earlier in the week:
Soupsie: When I think of all the things I am upset about right now…it is bc ppl don’t treat me how I would treat them. My problem…not theirs.
Me: I struggle with that, too. I try to treat people the way I want to be treated, but, with the exception of you, that NEVER happens.
Soupsie: Lol. Yup.
Me: Why are people shitty?
Soupsie: I think we need to work on our own perception. We can only control ourselves (and that’s a challenge sometimes!). Like Maya Angelou says…when someone shows you who they are…believe them.
Me: True dat. I need to quit expecting people to be good to me. I was watching This Is Us, and marveling at Toby – I want someone to be that kind to me. I can’t imagine!
Soupsie: See…those shows set up unrealistic expectations. I always say I live a soap opera life…my constant yearning. Lol.
Me: You are absolutely correct. My lack of a grip on reality is because of too much tv. I need to quit it all!
Soupsie: Lol…what would we do with ourselves?
This idea of managing expectations is one that keeps coming up for me lately – I feel like the fates are really trying to hammer this idea in to my head. I think I am getting better at expecting very little, and being pleasantly surprised with any good things that come my way. And then I see something like this surprise Disney proposal:
I have no interest in having something like this happening to me…and I’m not even that coocoo for Cocoa Puffs over Disney — but I want someone to care about me enough to go to the trouble. I want someone to give such a shit that they come up with a plan like this. I think it’s beautiful. 🙂
Soupsie would totally do something like this for me, I just know it. You read her stuff up there – she’s the real deal. 🙂