The One That Got Away

Before I start talking about what’s on my mind today, I want to urge you to listen to the song ‘The One That Got Away‘ by The Civil Wars – those people are soooo insanely talented, and that song is freaking mind blowing!!! Haunting!! Awesome!! Be sure to give it a listen!ย  ๐Ÿ™‚

Now to the topic at hand – the one that got away. Do you have one? Come on…be honest. I won’t judge. For me, I have always had a hard time wrapping my head around this idea because I’m a majorly definitive person – when I decide that something is done and I’m moving on, there is no waffling, no second guessing – nada. I am done. I don’t often pine over the past, because I truly believe that the best is yet to come, and people become a part of your past for a reason. I thought that I had a one that got away once years ago, but thankfully common sense prevailed and I realized that he and I, while immensely fond of each other, would have been a recipe for disaster in the long term – we were simply too different. While I was all ‘go go go’ and pondering ways to achieve my dreams of world domination before I was 30, he wanted to retire at the age of 20. Trรจs different, non? I still think of him fondly and wish him nothing but the best – I also think we ought to nominate his wife for a prize for putting up with him! ๐Ÿ˜‰ Over the years since then, I’ve had a couple of people that I’ve wondered about (should I have done something differently? should I have tried something that I didn’t think of and would that have made a difference? what should I have done?)…but really nothing that stuck out in my mind as being one that got away.

Like the lyrics of the song indicate (see below), I have met more than a few who should have been ones that got away, meaning I should never have tangled with them and their trifling asses in the first place! I think I knew at the time that they were totally wrong for me, and that absolutely nothing good was going to come from this, but still I gave it a whirl anyway. Ugh. Even I shake my head at myself. ๐Ÿ˜ฆ

image
Ahh….Kyle Chandler….if I had this one, I’d make sure he never got away! ๐Ÿ˜‰ (and I don’t mean that in a Kathy Bates-Miseryeque way – just FYI)

All of this makes me wonder about people and compatibility – in order for a relationship to work, do the people need to be pretty much the same, or will their similarities become redundant and boring and eventually kill the whole thing altogether? Are relationships more successful with opposites? While we know that opposites attract, does that attraction last? I find this topic – and the related idea of ‘chemistry’ to be endlessly fascinating….what draws two people together? And, even more interesting, what keeps them that way? I was thinking about this the other day and reflecting on the people that I find myself drawn to – if I was going to look for somebody with similar interests to me, I would probably be looking for a gay man, because not too many straight dudes dig art, museums, restaurants, fashion, cooking, wine and cocktail hours, and Sex and the City reruns (or, if they do, I have yet to find one). Thankfully, I have plenty of other interests, too, and I don’t usually have trouble finding common ground with people. Recently, however, I was having a conversation with somebody I had just met with a group of ladies from work, and I was prattling on, chattering a mile a minute when I noticed that their eyes completely glazed over, and they had mentally left the zip code. I wasn’t talking about anything too obscure, just something that I was interested in – when I realized that I might possibly be the most boring person they had ever met! I later remarked on this to my coworker (who had introduced all of us in the first place), and her reply was something flippant about how completely different I am from pretty much everyone who was in that group, and, while I’m flattered to be marching to the beat of my own drum, sometimes it hurts and I want to step in line with everyone else. I don’t know why I always seem to be on the outside looking in, and why I’m always the different one…I try to spin it all the time by reminding myself that ‘a tiger never loses sleep over the opinions of sheep’, but sometimes it’d be nice to feel like I fit in. It would be so awesome to be sitting in a group of people, chattering about whatever oddity has tickled my fancy that day – and not be looked at by everyone else like I had done something highly odd or inappropriate. I love being different, I love the fact that I’m my own girl and that I have my own interests and passions, but I just wish I could find a pack of like-minded people. That’d be nice, don’t you think? ๐Ÿ™‚

 

I never meant to get us in this deep
I never meant for this to mean a thing
Oh, I wish you were the one
Wish you were the one that got away

I got caught up by the chase
And you got high on every little game
I wish you were the one
Wish you were the one that got away

Oh, if I could go back in time
When you only held me in my mind
Just a longing gone without a trace
Oh, I wish I’d never ever seen your face
I wish you were the one
Wish you were the one that got away

I miss the way you wanted me
When I was staying just out of your reach
Begging for the slightest touch
Ooh, you couldn’t get enough, mmm

ย 

โ€œJust remember this- weird’s good. Embrace the weird, dude. Enjoy it because it’s never going away.โ€ (Tim Tharp, ‘The Spectacular Now’)

 

Tell me about your one that got away, friends. ๐Ÿ™‚

xxx

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