All I Need Is A Miracle

I’ve never been a person known for my incredible luck and good fortune – any good thing that has ever happened to me has been the result of a ton of hard work. I’ve had about ten lifetimes worth of freak accidents come my way – case in point: swimming with the Wee One last Saturday, and I somehow manage to become disoriented under the water and smash my face into the bottom of the pool. Hairline fracture to the nose. 😦

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I'm too sexy for my life

Lately I’ve really been feeling the need to do some things differently (starting with no more broken beaks), and make some changes. I’m unhappy with the direction some things are going, and I need to consciously change my mindset and try to do things and approach my life with a new set of eyes. I’m reminded of something the AMAZING Mindy Kaling wrote about her approach to life: “…write your own part. It is the only way I’ve gotten anywhere. It is much harder work, but sometimes you have to take destiny into your own hands. It forces you to think about what your strengths really are, and once you find them, you can showcase them, and no one can stop you.” This is what I need to do – I don’t seem to be having any luck or success with going about things the traditional way, so I’m going to have to take matters into my own hands and see what I can do. Let’s do some planning together, shall we?

I want more fulfillment in my career – I’m really happy in my current position, but I thought I would be further along in my career by now. I want more responsibility, and I want to be in a position where I can make a difference. I’ve been applying, I’ve been trying…nada. No luck. Nothing. So I’ve approached my amazing boss (seriously – she is the absolute best EVER, and I thank my lucky stars for her every day) about giving me more to do. Even though I’m super busy and work a whole lot of hours, I’m hoping that doing more, gaining additional experience and showing a willingness to take things on will pay off in the end and help with the bigger picture. I’m also working on expanding my writing by following up on some opportunities that have come my way – I really don’t know that much will come from either of these things, but you just never know if you don’t try, eh? And what have I got to lose? Absolutely nothing. Even if nothing comes from this, I’m no further behind – and, should something good come to fruition, then yaa me! 🙂 The sucky attitude that I’m always struggling to overcome wants to loudly declare that I doubt anything good can ever come my way – but, you know what? Screw that. Why shouldn’t good things come my way?? I’m just as good and worthy as anyone else – I just need to keep focused, keep trying, and chase that damn sucky attitude away. Enough of it – onward and upward. 🙂

I’m also really interested in Mindy’s idea of figuring out what your strengths are and focusing on those – although I fear that I’m completely and utterly unable to do this. Why? Because I’m not really sure that I have many strengths. Let me explain – there’s lots of things in this world that I’m interested in, many that I’m passionate about, a few that I’m mediocre and adequate at…but not a single damn one that I’m really good at. Not one. You know that expression ‘jack of all trades, master of none’? That’s this girl – and it sucks. I’m not being modest, just real – there is not one single thing that I can think of that if anyone who knew me needed special help with that particular thing that they’d call me. Isn’t that nuts? I think because I’ve severely lacked focus in my life I’ve never found a specialization…preferring instead to try everything at the buffet (which probably explains the width of my arse). This has led to an interesting existence and makes me a mildly entertaining dinner party guest, there’s no denying that – but it means that figuring out my strengths and how to showcase them is damn near impossible.

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I painted this at a Painting With A Twist Van Gogh class - I loved doing it, it didn't turn out too bad, but I don't think painting is my secret talent, sadly 😦

Are you watching the HBO series ‘Newsroom’ this season? Maggie, one of the younger staff members, has been harping like mad about wanting to do a story about Africa – she is constantly reading stuff, trying to work out an angle, and pitching a story pretty much daily…until she finally gets one approved and gets her trip to Africa to cover a story. Her producer asks her what’s with the Africa thing every day – and her response was something to the effect that she was trying to become an expert on something, that everyone in the office was the go-to expert on something or other…and she wanted to be an expert, too. As daffy as that kinda sounds, I absolutely get it – that’s what I want to be! The problem is that I can’t think of a single thing that I’m good enough at to work on even more so that I can become an expert! Any suggestions, friends? 🙂 (don’t say Africa, though, okay? That’s fictional Maggie’s thing)

I love Mindy’s idea of forging your own path…and I think that’s amazing advice, don’t you? 🙂 If you could write your own future, what would it look like? 🙂

Xxx

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