I love lips – I notice everyone’s lips, and lip color is an obsession of mine. I’ve written before of my unreasonably burning desire to be one of those broads who wears red lipstick and looks natural, awesome, and more than a little mysterious – however, I always turn out looking like a friggin’ clown. Always. I have tried a million shades of red, by expensive brands and cheapie-cheapies….and nothing works. Besides the fact that I look like a tragic Bozo painting, there’s something else going on, too: every single color that I try (and it seems that I’ve pretty much tried them all!), no matter how RED-FREAKING-RED it is in the tube, ends up looking pink on me!!!!! IT DOESN’T MAKE SENSE!!!!!!!!! Case in point: I bought this AMAZING color from Rimmel this week (hmmm…is that the problem? Bargain cosmetics? Actually, screw that…I’ve bought expensive stuff, and that shit still turns pink on me.)…here it is:
You would expect that a product that looks like deep red (with bluish undertones) would come out red, wouldn’t you? Well, you’d be wrong – on me, it is BRIGHT fuschia! We’re talking whore circa the1960s fuschia…it’s ridiculous! I just don’t get it! 😦 I don’t know if there is something wonky with the natural shade of my lips or what, but it appears that something cosmic and stupid is transpiring against me and my desire to be a red-lipstick-lady – perhaps I am not meant to be her. Maybe I am meant to be smaller in this world, to be a pink girl (I am totally a pink girl, but sometimes I’d like to be red, too), and to be content with that. Hmm.
Is my lipstick issue not about beauty at all, but instead a metaphor for life and my place in the world around me? Am I never meant to be a leader, a strong and powerful She-Ra Princess Of Power for my daughter and other little girls in the know to look up to? Am I meant, instead, to be a follower…a person who can be depended on to take care of business, get things done, yet never makes any waves of any sort or make any lasting impact on the world? Look at this sign…am I not meant to be a tiger?
I think those kind of people are perfectly fine, and there’s more than enough room around these parts for both tigers and sheep. But I ascribe to the philosophy of “If you ain’t the lead dog, the scenery never changes.” …which means that I want to be a tiger. I’m a really shitty sheep anyway, although I love them and their wee wooly suits more than I love most things. 😉 I’m not terribly great at going along with the plans of others, or following rules that I think are stupid (i.e. most rules), and I pretty much excel at marching to the beat of my own drum. I’ve been having a boatload of issues with a secretary at my school – she’s a person who lives and dies by the rules (to the detriment of kids), and when it comes to doing what’s best for kids, I will always throw policies out the window. Even though I’m not teaching in a classroom anymore, I’m still in the business of teaching kids…they will always be my priority. It causes a lot of friction between the secretary and I, to say the least – and we pretty much irritate the hell out of each other. Our strife puts unnecessary strain and tension on the work environment, but since I’m stubborn and I truly believe that I’m right, I’m digging in my heels. 🙂 Yaa me!!!
Maybe there’s hope for me becoming a tiger, yet! 😉